The Best End Credits Songs For Movies That Don’t Exist…Yet
My Mixtape’s A Masterpiece is a weekly feature in which a guest compiles a playlist around some theme. This week, Max Deering assembles 10 songs that would perfectly end a film. Read Max’s thoughts on each song and listen along to the Spotify playlist on top and/or the YouTube playlist at the bottom of the post.
I’m a sucker for end credits music. In the right hands, it’s the icing on the cake as the credits start to roll and the lights turn on. From a remixed version of the main musical motif (like John Carpenter’s rendition of his classic HALLOWEEN theme in HALLOWEEN (2018)), to an artist contributing an original song for a film, like Travis Scott’s ‘The Plan’ playing at the end of TENET. Even when it’s licensed music meant to play over the credits such as Moby’s “Extreme Ways” being used in the Bourne films; the expert deployment of a musical piece can make a film’s conclusion that much sweeter. With that in mind, the following mixtape is a curation of songs meant to play over the end credits of a hypothetical genre film (and in some instances, unproduced films), be they action, horror, big or small, etc. The ultimate idea being that these fictional films are tonally in sync with their attached end credits music.
1. “Vessel - Nine Inch Noize Version” by Nine Inch Nails and Boys Noize
I needed a shotgun blast to open this, so who better than Nine Inch Nails? In collaboration with Boys Noize, their latest album is nothing short of exceptional. The first real song on the album, “Vessel” is about as good as it gets and then some. If used correctly, a hard cut to credits as its harsh synth blares would make for a potent conclusion to some hypothetical science fiction action thriller. Even now I can see the credits coming up as the band’s industrial soundscape rattles a theater’s speakers. It would be nothing if not effective.
2. “In The Woods Somewhere” by Hozier
Hozier’s rhythmic guitar strumming alongside haunting lyrics sets the stage for some striking imagery. Lyrics such as “The night, so black that the darkness hums”, “The creature lunged, I turned and ran”, or “I found something in the woods somewhere” certainly bring to mind the aesthetics of horror, and the southern gothic sub-genre. Playing over the credits of this theoretical film, its moody atmosphere emphasizes an isolation and dread of the backwoods unknown. It’s an unnerving send-off to leave a viewer with as the credits roll.
3. “Pretty Handsome Awkward” by The Used
Propulsive, loud, and energetic, The Used’s single is a reminder of the bombastic feeling that comes with seeing some of the biggest movies in the middle of the summer. Compilation albums featuring various artists for these kinds of big studio releases may be fast becoming a thing of the past, but whether it’s to beat the heat, spend time with friends, or just pass the time, this kind of explosive music is a reminder of the spectacle that comes with summer break.
4. “Dangerous (feat. Kabbel)” by Perturbator
Aggressive, heavy, and promising violence, there’s an edge to this that lines up as the perfect capstone to a slasher. As a piece of darksynth, Perturbator’s edgy soundscape is the precise calibration needed for a certain kind of slasher throwback. Drenched in neon and filled with scuzzy alleyways soon to be filled up by hapless victims, “Dangerous” is the kind of send-off into the end credits that happens right after one last scare.
5. “After Dark” by Mr. Kitty
From darkwave to witch house, it might seem relatively easy at first to slot this into another straight genre film. If the previous entry on this list is meant to be played as the credits roll on a hypothetical stylized slasher, then “After Dark” would begin as the curtains closed on a doomed romantic drama. This isn’t to say this mythical film can’t be an amalgamation of different genres, but it should have a romance at the center. And given the sense of nostalgia and melancholy undergirding the lyrics, audiences leaving the theater should be reminded of those past loves that got away.
6. “Night”/ “Night - Zola Jesus and Dean Hurley Remix” by John Carpenter
The horror master made this one too easy. His Lost Theme albums are predicated on being hypothetical scores for hypothetical films, so why not instead go the extra mile and attach it to one of the many films he never got to make? My first pick? His unproduced slasher set in a nuclear power plant, MELTDOWN. “Night” is a striking piece of synth from Carpenter’s first Lost Themes album, fitting right at home in his oeuvre. The addition of the Zola Jesus and Dean Hurley Remix that could play as this conceptual film cuts to black would make for a fantastic capper for audiences to jam to while they unwind from Carpenter’s usual meat-and-potatoes filmmaking.
7. “Vortex” by John Carpenter
Continuing the trend of attaching Carpenter’s scores to his unmade projects, next up is “Vortex.” It’s the perfect theme for his unrealized SHADOW COMPANY, which would have seen the legendary director team up with writers Shane Black and Fred Dekker alongside Kurt Russell in the main role. As an action horror hybrid whose central premise had undead Vietnam veterans rise from the grave to attack the town they were buried in, “Vortex” represents Carpenter’s brand of chilling, dread-inducing synths with bombastic electric guitars that would have made for a thrilling exit as the credits roll.
8. “My Name Is Death” by John Carpenter
“My Name Is Death” from Lost Themes IV: Noir is the final Carpenter song to close out this little mini “trilogy.” The name of the album, and the associated genre are self-evident in what hypothetical film I think this song should play out to. Carpenter’s brand of cynicism throughout his films have always made him a prime candidate for a classic noir, and in many ways the closest he ever got was IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS. The idea of him bringing his trademark synth and electric guitar-laden soundscapes to a noir — be it classic or neo — sounds too good to be true, and sadly it is. But at least for this playlist, one can dream a little while longer.
9. “Tears in the Rain” by The Weeknd
I’ve always considered The Weeknd’s music extremely cinematic. Knowing “Tears in the Rain” is an intentional reference to Ridley Scott’s BLADE RUNNER only deepens that connection. With the combination of his haunted lyrics, trap beats, distorted guitar strumming and rippling synths, his earlier discography always sounds like he’s plagued by recurring nightmares of his extreme drug use, disassociated partying, and monumentally crushing heartbreaks that has left him adrift in some godforsaken unreality. All of which is to say that “Tears in the Rain” is perhaps the perfect, yet tragic capstone to close out a supposed Lynchian neo-noir that ends with just as many questions as it does an emotional gut-punch.
10. “Running Up That Hill” by Placebo
Full disclosure here: It was only within the last few years or so that I discovered Placebo’s “Running up that Hill” from 2003 was a cover version of Kate Bush’s original 1985 song. For the longest time I had associated their cover with its inclusion in the trailer for DAYBREAKERS, and since then — somehow — I had never heard the original version until its usage in Season Four of Stranger Things. Still, Placebo’s rendition has always stuck with me in part due to how effectively it sold the Spierig Brothers’ film, and to my taste is the superior version of the song. As to the end credits of the hypothetical film this cover is meant to play over? Well, whoever chose the song for the trailer to DAYBREAKERS had it right the first time: A dystopian, cyberpunk-esque action-thriller that closes out on a somber note. Sometimes the right idea is the first idea.
Finally, the inclusion of this song is a last minute addition due to the recent passing of the late, great Sam Neill earlier this week. Where I considered writing a full-fledged eulogy to his iconography within genre cinema and the indelible mark he left, I settled for this brief addendum. Given my love of Placebo’s cover and the actor’s presence within DAYBREAKERS itself, it felt like the right convergence of my own interests and ongoing events coinciding with one another. And while this is a somewhat gloomy note to end this mixtape on, my hope is that the song (and this article as a whole) serves as a memento to a man whose presence will be sorely missed yet will live on forever through the silver screen.
